Confusion

When I was a teenager, I was so together, so focus and so clear of what I want to be and where I want to end up in life. There was this driving force to drive me to excel. Failure was not an option back then.

My psychology lecturer was telling me about things on teenagers the other day. She was saying most of them are searching for their own identity, they are rebellious and things like that.

I am no longer a teenager but I find myself searching for my own identity. I am not proud of who I am. I want to reinvent myself.

Who am I?
1) I am this lazy bum who do things the last minute.
2) I am an adult who can't find a force in her to do her assignments.
3) I am this idiot who absolutely have no idea about social cues.
4) I am this human who doesn't like being myself...

Who was I?
1) A student that every teacher will love because of my out-going personality.
2) A student who had an ambition to drive her to excel.
3) A confident student and gymnast.

Who is it that is living my life?
I don't know who's she...
I don't know who am I...