Monday, 27 July 2009

Fucking Hate Dancing!

I went for the audition for PTUM. When I got back from the energy-draining audition, I thought I'd totally nailed it. Unfortunately, it turned out to be the opposite. My juniors got it while I got no reply from them.

This made me question myself for the whole day. Who am I to choreograph and lead a dance troupe when I myself is not even qualified for a bigger event in UM. What am I doing all these while, choreographing when I don't even have the talent? I feel so shameful, so disappointed that I actually look up and appreciate every little things I did for my residential college.

Arul asked me to snap the thoughts out from my mind. How could I when it questions what I am trying to achieve all these while? What's my talent? Do I even have a talent for dancing or was it just passion?

Dancing is my life, it is just how I express myself...

And I so fucking hate dancing right now!!!

Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!

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